This card by Mary Engelbreit is a favorite of mine and it is timely for right now. It is almost a year since the pandemic hit. I look back at our calendar for January/February 2020 and nearly every weekend was full with play dates, movies out and most of all, dates for getting together with friends. Then all of the sudden it all comes to a halt after the first week of March. The calendar remains bare until it picks up again with outdoor social distance dates in the summer. Then later in the year once cold weather hits, connecting goes back to Zoom happy hour dates/ phone calls and texts Of course all that is no substitute for face to face visits and for friends that are in another state, we have not seen each other in over a year. And that is a statement I never would have believed could be true.
But true friendships can be a comforting presence without the pleasure of being physically present. Being “together” doesn’t always mean being in the same space. Indeed, there are friends that remain constant in our lives even though we are not face to face.
There is a quote going around that says that one should especially honor friendships that allow you to pick up from where you left off , regardless of how long it’s been since you have connected; and that friendships that survive those silences and space are the ones that never diminish. I would beg to differ somewhat with that. Friendships need communication to survive . You can’t just neglect your garden and expect your flowers to grow! It’s the same with friendships. Of course one can go without seeing each other and still pick up where one left off months and maybe years later. But without a caring connection in between….the checking in on each other… the sharing and giving attention to each other.. there is something that is diminished. To me, the friendships that flourish are the ones that may have to withstand distance and spaces, but still care to keep up with what is happening in each other’s world and what matters to each other. Those are the delightful “constants” in life. Near or far, they are the ones that make a difference and matter.
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